Giving Back

I just had the most rewarding experience happen to me, and its all thanks to Alpha Chi. Thank goodness Kylie woke me up this morning to help with A-Day, because I needed this so much. Alpha Chi has a booth out on the quad today, and I had to run back to the house and grab something because we forgot a banner.  I was walking past this girl, who kept look at me, but I didnt really thing anything of it.  

I passed her, but I heard an excuse me, and I turned around.  

Now lets just pause here for a second.  

If you know me, you know I dont usually respond to anything or anyone who isnt right in front of me, yelling at me, thats just my attention span.  But this time, I stopped and turned around.  

The girl started out by asking me if I was an Alpha Chi, and I said yes.  She then said "Thank you so much for what you guys did on April 8th, it really means a lot." (April 8th was AlphaTraz, where we raised money by putting people in our jail, raising money for domestic violence victims.   It took me completely off guard.  I then thanked her for even saying anything, and that it meant a lot.  She then said thank you, and I just looked at her, and said, you are welcome.  It completely humbled me, and almost made me cry.  First of all, this girl had the guts to stop and tell me thank you, which in and of itself is amazing.  But to know that what we did people actually noticed also made me so proud. It made me proud of my sisters, proud of my organization, and proud to wear the letters that I wear today.  It also reinforced that giving back always gives back to you, in some way or another, no matter what happens.    

Most of what I hear or see is people judging greeks. People saying that all we do is party, drink, and haze.  They dont see that we raise money for domestic violence victims, or that the fraternities hold dance parties to raise money for their various philanthropies, or that we were all at walk-a-mile, or relay for life. 

For all those people, Im so sorry that you feel that way.  Im so sorry that you will never feel the way I feel, or be proud of something so great.  Yes, we are elite. Because of the things we do, say, and learn.  

I am proud of Alpha Chi Omega.  Im proud that I picked such a fantastic organization to be a part of.  

And just keep in mind, all that it took was for one person to stop me and tell me two little words, for me to stop and think about how amazing AXO really is. 

:) Im off my soapbox now. but this week of hell ended fantastic, and Im so happy and ready for a fantastic weekend with some great people :)

I. Love. Being. Greek. 

Learning

I feel like the past month has been a learning experience for me. I have struggled so much with fitting in, and feeling like I have to be a certain person that I definitely am not.  My confidence has completely gone out the window, and I have been hurting because I feel like I am constantly never good enough.

I guess Im sick of trying to please people.  Thinking Im overweight, or a terrible friend, or that I cant do something.  

Sure, Im not the skinniest girl in the world. but who cares? If I want to change that bad enough I could.

So what if I don't have a boyfriend?  I am a complete person without a boyfriend.  I love myself to know that the right person will come along when I am well ready.  He will make an effort, and love me for exactly who I am, no matter what. 

I dont want anyone in my life that doesnt want me to be in theirs.  If you dont like me, thats fine.  I can find someone who cares about me more.

Im done not being good enough.  Im done being someone who has no self confidence, and who hooks up with boys just to make herself feel better.  I am only giving myself to those who deserve me, with friendships, relationships, anything. 

Im living this life for God, and he will lead me where ever he wants me, and for now, that is right here, flying solo, being exactly who I am, and going where ever He tells me to go. 

Loving life, so much.  and its only going to get better, just you wait and see:)