Forgive me for liking you too much, I’ll forgive you for not liking me enough. Forgive me for the loud racing of my heart, I’ll forgive you for not hearing it. Forgive me for finding you amazing, I’ll forgive you for never noticing. Forgive me for wanting to be with you more than anything, I’ll forgive you for avoiding me. Forgive me for being so pathetic, I’ll forgive you for taking advantage of it. Forgive me for not being able to let go, I’ll forgive you for never holding on.

thats all I have to say for now....I am just confused today.

shit.

....those were the last words that came out of my mouth. literally....well. okay. story time.

Went out to the barn to ride, just like any other day. saddled up my oh so dear horse....and took him out to the arena. Kaitlin Pittman and the girl I nanny, Madison, were with me and Kaitlin was riding Madison's horse, Tigger, and I was riding my horse Thomas. I get on, and this is where it all goes wrong. Mistake A: I didnt lunge him. He had already been out today, and he acted like he was about to fall asleep when we went out there. Mistake B: I wore my hair down. I never wear my hair down when I ride....ever. anyways. to cut this boring story short.......Thomas freaked out because the other horses in the pasture scared him and he tucked his head and started bucking. Like, bucking bronc bucking. I stayed on for a good 30 seconds......then fell...right on my shoulder. Could have been worse I suppose, but it still hurt like hell. Current situation is: Im sitting in Kirsten's house because....well because Im awesome like that. I cant move my left arm, and Thomas is tied in his stall, hopefully thinking about the naughty deeds he did. Stupid horse. Thats all. I will be going to the doctor tomorrow....hopefully I dont die before then :)

--Me.

You know, I dont know what the future may hold, but I know as long as I have good friends to surround me, family to support me, and enough money to get by...I dont really care. Living my life to be happy is all Im doing right now, and I absolutely love it. Im getting good grades for me, Im getting up and getting dressed and ready for me, Im being me, and no one else. I finally feel like I am who I am supposed to be, and I adore it.
Life lately seems like it has been spiraling out of control, and I have just been stuck in this endless twister of confusion....who Im supposed to be, where Im supposed to be, why am I even where I am. All the possibilities, the choices Ive had to make, they have seemed to overwhelm me. Finally, that twister has slowed down, I feel like Im back on my feet again. These choices seem easier to make, and life seems like its so much easier all of a sudden.
Ive been in and out of love, liked so many people, and spent endless tears on guys who werent worth my time. Im over it. I have wonderful guy friends who are better to me than any boyfriend Ive ever had. I dont need a man to make me happy, and when Im ready for one, God will put him into my life, and make this wonderful journey better than it already is. Too many times Ive seen friends, roommates, and people I dont even know cry over boys, and I dont need that in my life.
Jobs, money, it all seems so distant to me. Im doing what I wanna do, and thats all I care about. I also know that God will get me a job, in due time. It may be difficult, but I will keep trying and He will give me the right opportunity, in due time. :)
Life is good. God is taking care of me. I am happy. <3

What? Its already May????

Well.

Its may.

Where the heck did second semester go? ...better yet, where did my first year of college go?

I had the most amazing year of my life. I made some of the best friends anyone could ever have, I'm so lucky. I came to college so scared that I would not fit in. I have discovered a lot about myself and a lot about who the person I want to become. College is nothing like what I expected it to be, it was a lot harder, and A LOT more fun. Some of the many things I've learned:

1. Dance parties are acceptable anywhere.

2. A double room in the LLC can be arranged many different ways.

3. Going to bed at midnight is exceptionally early.

4. You find out who your friends are, the real ones stay and the ones who weren't meant to be fade away.

5. You don't need people in your life who aren't going to support you, there are billions of people in this world.

6. It is one thing to think it, completely different to act on it.

7. Boxed brownies are amazing, anytime.

8. You can pick two of the three: socialize, sleep, or study. You cant have all three.

9. You acquire the most random stuff over the year. Stuff you just cant throw away because of the memories that come with it.

10. There's no place like home. :]

11. Marketplace food is good for about a month. After that, its just gross.

12. 8:30 am is wayyyy too early for a class.

13. Late night taco bell runs are THE BEST

14. Laundry can wait as long as possible, either till you run out of underwear or you go home for the weekend.

15. Facebook is the worst/best way to procrastinate. EVER.

16. You find some person on facebook you dont even know, and you have 10 mutual friends.

17. Walmart adventures are the best.

18. Going on adventures consists of going to Idaho to buy lotto tickets, or pulling pranks.

19. Kissing random people on a concrete block is normal, its called becoming a True Aggie.

20. Your very first date in college gives you a VL card when he kisses you. An actual card.

20 things is not even enough, I have learned so much :]

Like I said before, I have met the most amazing people ever this year.

Can I just tell you, that I have never had to share a roo

m in my life. I was so scared that I would hate having a roommate, or that they would hate me. My roomies(All 8 of them), are the most amazing girls ever, I was so lucky. A diverse group of girls, but we meshed so well. I know I can be hard to live with sometimes, but they put up with me pretty well. Between dishes, and dirty bathrooms, to dance parties, and crazy adventures at 6 a.m., they have been the most amazing girls to live with. Can I please just say how lucky I am again? :] I just love them, so much.

Jac.(Piderman)

My actual roomie, ohhh boy. Where do I begin? The cutest girl ever. Every boy that sees her falls in love with her. Also, she is the only girl I have ever met that can pull off red/purple hair, and look even better than amazing...I didnt actually meet her this year though, it wasn't exactly fate that brought us together. HSI 2007....oh boy. The UW 3 week long summer camp that

was probably one of the most fun summers ever. I didn't really know her at the time, but I remember her doing my hair...just like she did all this year....:)

Pillow talk--our late night talks (which i usually fell asleep to) and watching baman piderman videos, listening to her talk in her sleep, and her becoming my little, she is in so many parts of my life sometimes it can be a bit scary. We share way too much, clothes, most boys we have ever been involved with...haha. She is such a big inspiration to me(getting up at 6 a.m. to work out is something I could never do.) and living with her has taught me so much :)

Katie.

Oh Katie. She knows how to have fun :) Even though I didnt know her super well until this last semester, she has to be one of the most fun, gorgeous girls I have ever met. She gets all the boys. She makes me laugh all the time, and those crazy nights I will never forget always include her. I think its the saddest for me to say goodbye to her because she's going to be so far away.

Alycia.

This girl has been there for me when I've needed i

t the most. She was there to listen to me anytime. Sitting on her bed talking to her while she was doing her hair or fixing her makeup is one thing I will never forget, we talked about anything and everything. She is also one of the most fun and random person I've ever met. It makes me sad to know she isnt coming back next year, but I know that she is going to have so much fun being married to the love of her life :)

Jennika.

I could go on all day about this girl. Gorgeous, smart, funny....:) She has the confidence I wish I had. She just makes me smile, all the time, no matter what Im doing. She has been so fun to live with, there is never a dull moment with Jen around. I just love her so much!!!!!

Caitlin.

Now if you wanna talk about fate....haha. but really. We were in connections together and she just happened to be in one of my classes and started eating lunch with me, jen, and alycia every day after this class. We also rushed together :) She is an amazing person, organized, gorgeous, and so many other things. I was so happy when she moved in with us at the beginning of second semester! It seems like she has been our roomie all along!

Eunji.

I didnt know her that well, but she was an awesome roommate! She had the cutest clothes and was always so nice. All of us used to see her and squint our eyes and pop our foot up and make a peace sign, it was great fun.

Krista.

This woman, i swear never slept. She does so much stuff, and is so successful. although she wasnt around much and I didnt get to spend near enough

time with her, the time I spent was so much fun. She has accomplished so much and will accomplish so much more in the future...shes just amazing!

Im going to miss these girls so much. Each and every one of them. They were so amazing, that even what I wrote about each of them isnt enough. They have been the ones that made my freshman year so great. I love you guys.

My AXO sisters have also been another reason I have made it through my freshman year, without having them to run to sometimes I would have gone crazy. I cannot name you all in my blog...it would take too long. but I love you all so much and I'm so excited to live with you next year! I love my A Chi O :]

oh.

Sam, Kurt, Ian, Mike, Steve, Thomas, Spencer, Jake, Tyler, and Chris...(AKA boys down the hall)

Thanks for just being awesome. :] you guys were the best guy friends a girl could have, love you all, no matter how well I knew all of you individually. You always knew how to make me laugh or make me feel better when I was feeling down!!!!!

Second Semester

Happy 2010!!!
I have now started my second semester at USU, and Im loving every minute of it.
I love almost all of my classes. Stats 1040 might kick my butt, but Im hoping it isnt too terrible.
We had one of our roommates move out this semester, so Caitlin, one of my good friends from connections moved in with Eunji, one of our roommates from last semester. I love having her here. :)
I love being an active Alpha Chi Omega. :) its the best. We just did recruitment last week for spring semester, and it was crazy, that whole week was so busy.

Me and my roommate Jac bought at $12 couch at the DI and put our beds into bunk beds. Our room is pretty much the best room in the LLC right now. haha.
I will be posting pictures soon, stay tuned!!! haha.

OH!
and if anyone ever wants to send me anything, even a card...my address is:

Chelsea Bergstrom
0199 Old Main Hill
LLC Building D301
Logan, UT 84322

I would appreciate any mail you are willing to send thanks. :)

Merry Christmas!

It definitely feels like christmas, with the snow coming down as i write this! Beka is getting ready for bed as we speak, waiting for santa to come!

being home is very relaxing, and i love it. Seeing old friends is awesome, but its weird to think most of them are going on missions and I wont see them again for two years. Im growing up, and i dont know if i like it or not!!!!

I miss all my friends back at USU though, and I miss dance parties! me and caitlin and alycia went over to the Pike house the weekend before finals and plugged my ipod into their stereo system downstairs and had a dance party. it

was interesting, to say the least. Atleast we know how to have fun! :)

I wish it was spring already, I hate the snow.

This is one of the very rare times you will see me out in the snow, and smiling about it! My roommate Jac took me snowmobiling while i was visiting her after finals and we went snowmobiling. I got a little chilly, but I actually had fun!

I was driving back from christmas eve service tonight and almost spun off the road. luckily our tahoe has good tires. :) But i still dont like the snow! the only time its okay for it to snow is on christmas. and its supposed to be clear and sunny this year. God sure has a sense of humor...haha.

Well.

Santa is coming. I must go to sleep!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

First Semester, complete!

one semester of college done, ten million more to go. :)

the most insane 4 months of my life so far, and i love every second of it. Where I am now I would have never thought i would have been 6 months ago. I have grown so much as a person and realized more about myself than I ever thought I would.
The rest of my college career is going to be a wild ride, and I am so ready for it. Im ready to create my future and my life the way I have always imagined it. :]
Ive learned to accept myself, and learn that people that you dont like really arent worth keeping in your life. Its not going to do me any good to have someone in my life who just causes me to stress constantly. Ive also learned that being alone isnt that bad, and sometimes it can be a good thing. And being single is great. I am waiting for the right person to come sweep me off my feet. But Im willing to wait. :] God is taking care of me, and I know this because without him I probably would have already failed.

Ive also learned that people will come in and out of your life, but the true friends are the ones you stay by your side forever. I have a lot of new friends in my life, and they mix right in with the old ones. My roommates, my AXO sisters, and everyone else Ive met at USU have all been amazing people that i wish to keep for the rest of my life. But along with them I have my old friends, Ash, Jorge, Jaren, and all of you who i love :] who have still stuck by my side no matter the distance, and we still act crazy together and dont let anything hold us back from having a good time.

My family has supported me through all of this and i wouldn't have even made it this far without them. They are my rock, my support, and my go to. My parents are the whole reason I'm here, and I could never tell them how thankful I am for that.

High school is only the beginning, and for those of you who are in high school, enjoy it while you can. its fun, easy, and you have to be there, so make the best of it. because when you leave you realize that the rest of your life is way too short to waste time hating what your doing.

all and all, i love my crazy beautiful life. no matter how ugly it can get at times. :]

My To-Do list at USU:

Become a true aggie(officially)
go to midnight pizza at the junction
attend as many basketball games as possible
clean the sink at angies!
....I know theres more. but i just cant think of them right now!