Its been a while

Well.

It actually hasn't been a while. 

but it feels like its been a while.

I have been running. and running. and running.

Looking for someone/something to make me happy. 

Boys, a hobby, anything really to spark something in me that makes me want to get up in the morning. 

Well. Its not any of those. Sad to say that boys kindof suck, and hobbies are great, when you have time for them. My hobby is sitting on the computer....which is probably not a very good hobby but we will settle that later. For now sitting on the computer is all I want to do on my free time! 

Anyways. Happiness. Its different for you, me, and everyone else in the world. Snow doesn't make me happy...but maybe it makes...oh I dont know. My neighbor happy. Horses make me happy, and Ive heard countless people tell me that horses suck...(which is crazy to me. but alright!)...but that's their happiness, not mine. 

I think what it all comes down to is acceptance, and acceptance that happiness can just come to you, randomly when you may just want to be sad...

I have found that church makes me happy. Being with people who believe like me...makes me happy. Putting all that sadness somewhere else so God can take care of it....

Thats what makes me happy. Which also triggers a lot of things that can make me happy. Little things. Like this blog. and sunshine. and rain. and happy music. 

Yep. Im tired. Its been a long week/weekend. and its only monday...all over again. So dont mind the randomness of this post....

I love life.

I love Jesus. 

and I love even the sucky sad times in life...

Because they will bring me joy, I just dont realize it yet!!! 

:)  

I honestly feel like the last three days have been the longest days of my entire life. I went from being on my highest of highs, to my lowest of lows, to being back on that high, for a different reason. 

I know this sounds so vague, but I have class at 9 and I have got to get some sleep. but no worries, this story will be expanded.

:) Love you all.

Me and my silly animals.

You know what I realized today? 

I have had Thomas in Logan with me for almost a year. Now he is home, cause Ive been too busy and I need to focus on school....but what am I going to do with my life now? 

Then I got to thinking a little more, and I realized I have had animals in my life literally since I was born. 

I started riding horses when I was three....

My family got our dog...Kip when I was 4. I was really sick, and my dad brough this adorable little puppy in with a bow on her collar, and I loved her until she died in 2008 of thyroid cancer. :(

Got my horse Kassi when I was...7....(I think? Dont hold me to that)

Sorry I dont have a picture, maybe Ill scan one and put it in later :) 

Got  Thomas when I was 12...which caused me to start showing in UPHC a year later :)

We had Kassi's babies, Buddy and Rusty, and got Stan too. 

I got Joey, my big horse for 14-18, but I only had him a few years. He was great but we never really clicked.

My parents traded Stan for a purebred black lab and we have had her about a year now, January 2010 was when she came to our house. 

Shes adorable and huge now, and full of energy....but she's never been....calm I guess haha

And then we rescued Quin. My parents got called about a mini Australian shepherd that came in as a stray to the humane society. He was getting fixed to be put up for adoption, but he didnt even make it back to the shelter. My dad went and looked at him, picked him up and brought him home, where he now gets to play with Izzy and get loved all the time. Hes my buddy when Im home, and gets loved wayy too much by me, but its okay :)

I guess what Im saying is, I have never lived my life without animals, and I never plan to. It will be really strange without Thomas around to go visit everyday. The hair they shed, and the messes they make are just a little price to pay for the companionship they provide. :) Its a good thing my roommate has a dog I can play with!

Oh Christmas....break.

I realize how much school takes up my time when I don't have school.....

Tumblr, pinterest, facebook and twitter have been taking over my life.....which is really sad. 

As I look back on 2011 I think about the roller coster it has been....I think about the fabulous friends and family I have, and the amazing people who are in my life. So heres the pictures, I think I got it all covered :) 

Exec Board 2011 AXO

USU--Region Champs 2011

Me and Bree :) 

Chelsea and Chelsea. This is really not attractive. haha Lyre week Spring 2011

Me and my grandlittle :) 

Step Show Spring 2011

me and my bestest friend

Senior dinner :) My big

DSP formal Spring 2011 I love these boys so much!

AXO Spring formal 

Summer--Santa Monica pier

Beach :) 

me and carlos :) 

my newest little, Jacki -- fall 2011 new member class 

me and Whitney in the summer!

Caitlin's wedding :) freshman year roomies!

Me and Chelsea Dean

Pike dance party in the fall

Me and Thomas :) 

DSP Toga Party

Phi Men Black and Purple ball

Fall recruitment 

Christmas!

Heres to 2012! 

That classic end of year post.

It seems like just yesterday I was ringing in 2011, but now its almost 2012!

And just a little secret, I never got used to writing 2011 until like, last month.....So now I get to get used to writing another year all over again....yay.....

As I look back on 2011 I think about all the fantastic times I had. My college career has been something I have never imagined, and I would never expect any different. But this year has been a true roller coster for me, and so now making plans for the future has really set my priorities in order. Fall 2011 semester was hell. Literally, I dont think I could have had a worse semester than I did last semester. Between juggling two jobs, exec board for AXO, and doing school at the same time, I just got burnt out. I was having a lot of problems emotionally and let it take a toll on my entire life. Im not going to go into details, but staying strong was one of the hardest things to do, and at times I wasn't succeeding. If it wasn't for my mom being in Logan, I dont know if I would have made it through. 

My grades took a turn for the worst, but I think I can come back from that, but what I really took from last semester is that even though I can be put through trials, I can make it through, and become a better person. I have reflected on my mistakes and learned from them, and am now living in the moment and planning for the future with the best intentions in mind. 

2012 will be a lot different. I moved out of AXO into my own house, so I could focus on school and myself. I am not on exec anymore, and I quit Cal Ranch and am now working at the bookstore permanently :) Although it makes me sad I wont be as involved in Alpha Chi, I am very glad I got to serve on the exec board last year, and hope that the girls taking over this semester will take our chapter to a whole new level! I am completely dedicating myself to school and bettering myself, which Im really excited about. I think I can be so much better than I already am and I need to allow myself to reach that. 

Alsoooo....I am planning on entering myself into the doTerra slim and sassy contest for 2012. I want to be healthy again, and Ive tried this before and it was working, but I stopped doing it. So now Im going to go back on it and enter this contest! Im going to blog about my new "adventure" I guess you could say, and it will be on my other blog: http://chelseabergstrom.blogspot.com/ :) It's very plain right now, but I will be revamping it, dont worry. Me and my friend Taylor will hopefully be entering the contest. 

So heres to 2012, to changing for the better and learning from my mistakes. Im learning to be the person I was meant to be :) 

Thanks.

I felt really bad for not getting around to tell everyone what I was thankful for over the month of November, but I figured now is better than never right?  I got to spend a wonderful holiday with my mom, my dad, my sister and my niece. I am so thankful for my family, even though they may be far from perfect, and we may be having some tough times, I can always count on my dad to be there when I need a good hug and my mom to be there when I need someone to talk to. My sister is always there with good advice and a good laugh when I need one, and Beka, well she is just Beka, cute and obnoxious but I love her anyways. 

Im thankful for my best friends, especially Jordan. We drove all the way to Afton on friday night (which is a half hour drive) so we could get our favorite snack, sour patch watermelons. They didnt have them in Thayne, so we decided it would be nice best friend bonding to go to Afton, and it was a pathetic, but really great little trip. 

Im thankful for the USU Greek System. I have met such wonderful people here at USU, I dont even know what I would do without them. You know who you are, and you have impacted my life more than I will ever know.

Im thankful for my sisters. As everyone knows, I have been having a really hard time this semester with everything I have been going through, and my sisters have been there every step of the way to be there for me when I am sad, or to make me smile on a bad day. They have also led me on crazy adventures and taken me on long drives for life chats. I dont know what I would do without these crazy girls, I love them so much!

Im thankful that God is there for me and still leading me on the path that he wants me to be on. Im so grateful that He never gives up, even on me :) 

Im also thankful for those who have taught me something I needed to learn, and then sortof...."exited" my life. These individuals have taught me things I could not have learned without the experiences we have shared together, and I thank them for being in my life the short time that they were. 

All in all, life is pretty great if you choose to look at it that way. I can't ever forget what I have going well for me, and no matter how bad it seems, there is a light at the end of the tunnel of any trial Im going through. 

Happy late Thanksgiving!

Photoshoot.

Can I just say, 

Sami Jo Shurtleff is the most amazing photographer ever.   

I love these pictures so much :)

and I just realized how much I rely on my horse and the barn to keep me sane, without it I dont even know what I would do.